Somewhere Between Two Homes

A couple sat on a bench along the balcony of a rooftop coffee shop, their two dogs at their feet. With the autumn breeze and light jazz music drifting through the air, they drank, talked, and occasionally turned to the view as the city moved around them.

The man came to Shanghai nearly four years ago from the United States, eager to explore more of Asia. Now, he teaches English at a school to young children.

When he first landed, Shanghai initially announced itself through its noises.

“It’s so many sounds all together”, he said, “you hear construction, you hear people talking, you hear just so much daily life.”

He also recalls the constant movement of Shanghai, with scooters weaving through traffic, people walking along the street, construction workers bustling back and forth… It's very different from his hometown, which he describes as much quieter.

During his years in Shanghai, he learned to eat foods he had never imagined trying. He has also learned the social rules that come with the meals,  pouring drinks for older family members, raising a glass to say “cheers” when toasting.

While he is still learning Chinese, which he finds challenging, he can already say simple terms like “我听不懂 (I don’t understand)” in daily conversations.

When asked whether he perceives these cultural differences as good or bad, he hesitated: “I wouldn’t describe them as positive or negative,” he said. “It’s just a different experience I have to get used to.”

Perhaps that is what his life in Shanghai has become, not a replacement for home, but an accumulation of new experiences that constructs a new world.

However, he isn’t the only one with a journey shaped by movement and adaptations.

The woman grew up in Yunnan, and eventually came to Shanghai after graduating.

She studied fashion and worked in the industry in London before transitioning to marketing. “I thought to do something related to the field, and then it’s just right,” she said.

Their dogs

Their dogs

The two arrived in this big, vibrant, and diverse city with completely different backgrounds and goals; their paths crossed at a small bar, and they have now lived there for two years already.

They have two dogs, with the smaller one older than the other, and they have travelled together both within China and abroad many times.

Facing common challenges in long-distance relationships, their families have found their own way to stay connected. “They often speak on the phone,” the man said, “say hi to each other and tell each other how beautiful they are”.

When the families finally meet, they expect there to be a lot of translation.

“One day, it will happen. We just don’t know when”, he said, smiling.

While their families cannot yet speak directly to one another, the couple has built a bridge between them, just like how they built a world of their own in this city.

On the rooftop, the two dogs lay quietly on the floor. With the bottoms of our cups shown through the last few sips of sparkling water, our conversation also came to an end.

The city below was still full of the things that captivated him upon his arrival: the rush of scooters, the hum of voices, the relentless beat of construction, and many more people.

Shanghai is still the same as it ever was; it hasn't become a home by being any more similar to their hometowns.

Instead, in this place between two cultures, both of them created something that belonged entirely to them, making “home” about what we construct rather than where we came from.